Well, that's the perfect capper to an absolutely exceptional dick punch of a year. I was ready to put the finishing touches on my usual year in review, having worked on it for several weeks now, carefully explaining why I felt the below albums were so good (or justify my assertion that they were good in the first place), only to log in today to find it inexplicably deleted and irretrievable. Which is sort of how I feel about the rare good things that managed to poke their heads through the avalanche of shit this year -- they fought to the surface only for a moment, before quickly being buried in another cascade. Take time to write about all the good music that came out this year, one of your favorite things to do? OK -- but I'm going to wipe that out before you're finished and can share it with others. Switch jobs in part to try and bring to fruition something you've been pushing for piecemeal for years? OK -- but I'm going to surround you with micromanagers and misfits who are going to make it almost impossible for you to focus on that and advance. Redesign your kitchen and improve things in your house? OK -- but I'm going to make you live like a hoarder and deal with an insufferable, ignorant asshat of a contractor for eight months.
This year was about punishment and your ability to withstand it inhuman amounts. About watching the things you care most about -- intelligence, integrity, and the careful application of craft -- be ignored or impugned in growing amounts. Nothing escaped unscathed or was permitted to shine too long. That two of the best things of my entire life had to occur in the midst of this unrelentingly misery is a bit like falling in love at a mass shooting or finding a bottle of water in the middle of a house fire. It sullies their individual splendor and feels insufficient in the face of what surrounds it. And what's around them is an almost laughable litany of lousiness -- friends getting divorced. Coworkers and relatives unexpectedly passing. The global culling of icons from almost every corner of our culture. (Honestly, look at the list of folks here -- you'll be saying "holy fuck" by about picture fifteen -- and those are just folks that have passed this month.) To say nothing about the unholy abortion that was this election and what is waiting in its wake.
So rather than step right back in front of the DPM Charlie Brown style to recreate what I'd painstakingly put together for these albums, I'm cutting my losses and putting my head down. I'll maybe see you all next year. I might just lock myself in the basement and call it a day. Enjoy the below and if you really want to hear my thoughts on them, just hit me up. Appropriately enough there's thirteen of them for this nightmare of a year.
Here's to next year not being the Old Country Buffet of fucking terribleness like this one was...
Soundtrack to the Apocalypse: The Best of 2016
1. Kanye West -- The Life of Pablo: he's a thin-skinned, self-important asshole. And quite possibly a legitimate crazy person. But apparently that's our thing now. So pop on the perfect soundtrack to our modern times and buckle up. It's gonna be a heck of a ride.
2. Bon Iver -- 22, A Million: soundtrack to the most intense, stressful, and ultimately happy week of my life. Did that really happen this year? Yep -- a measly two fucking months ago. I feel the joy of that event still like a morbidly obese person feels their abs. FML.
3. Parquet Courts -- Human Performance; the Kills -- Ash & Ice; Black Pistol Fire -- Don't Wake the Riot: bands I'm obsessed with that're good.
4. Lewis del Mar -- Lewis del Mar; Ona -- American Fiction: bands that are brand new that're good.
5. White Denim -- Stiff; Woods -- City Sun Eater in the River of Light: bands that start with W and sort of sound alike that're good.
6. Kevin Morby -- Singing Saw; Hamilton Leithauser + Rostam -- I Had a Dream that you Were Mine; Lumineers -- Cleopatra: bands that sound old that're good.
7. Pete Yorn -- Arranging Time; Violent Femmes -- We Can do Anything; A Tribe Called Quest -- We Got it From Here...Thank You 4 Your Service: bands I used to listen to a lot that're back unexpectedly and still good.
8. Boxer Rebellion -- Ocean by Ocean; Local Natives -- Sunlit Youth: bands like the California fall (80s (sounding) and sunny) that're good.
9. Andrew Bird -- Are you Serious; Wilco -- Schmilco: hometown bands back from mediocre albums that're good.
10. Catfish and the Bottlemen -- The Ride; Frightened Rabbit -- Painting of a Panic Attack: bands from the UK that're good.
11. The Coathangers -- Nosebleed Weekend; FIDLAR -- Too: punk bands that're good.
12. Miike Snow -iii; Prism Tats -- Prism Tats: bands with falsetto singers that're good.
13. Band of Skulls -- By Default; Kings of Leon -- WALLS: bands you don't quite trust / want to like that're good.
That's it. GOFY 2016.
--BS
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